Monday Morning Podcast 12-21-20

  • күнү жарыяланды 2 ай мурун

    Bill Burr

    узактыгы: 1:11:28

    Bill rambles about people flipping out, French films, and advice for an Asian dude.
    Full Episodes of the Monday Morning Podcast: bit.ly/2nAzwGV
    Full Episodes of the Thursday Afternoon Podcast: bit.ly/2mTA6Cy
    Full Episodes of the MMP One-Shots: bit.ly/2oNClY2
    Here’s the website! billburr.com
    I was born a freckled child in a land far away during a much simpler time. I did well in school until it counted. As a freshman in high school I had dreams of going to Notre Dame and becoming a lawyer. By the time I was sophomore I was taking shop class and was considering getting into construction. I ended up working in warehousing and unloading trucks. Other than stand up, that job was the most fun I ever had.
    I am now a stand up comedian. I do a couple hundred shows a year. And I enjoy the travel. I’ve done four hour-long stand-up specials: “Why Do I Do This”, “Let It Go”, “You People Are All The Same” and “I’m Sorry You Feel That Way.” I host a podcast each week called The Monday Morning Podcast. And I have an animated series on Netflix called: ‘F’ Is For Family.’ Occasionally I act in movies but only when they let me.

Flavorless Denial
Flavorless Denial

Yay Bill talked about Eddie Izzard

Ай мурун
Adi
Adi

I just wanna say that this episode's opening is one of my favorites for some reason. I legit replay this episode just to hear the opening every now and then

Ай мурун
Danny Hoffmann
Danny Hoffmann

Open a funny bone!! A place that all the comics dont really like hahaha

Ай мурун
IPA
IPA

To that Asian dude, I submitted a response to Bill but I don't think he is going to read it out. So here you go: "First of all, I think Bill have no idea how difficult it is for Asian males to date in the US. There is a Huffpost video about an attractive asian male model, 6-ft tall with a 6 pack, still struggles in finding a date. Don't get me wrong, I am not saying it is not difficult for men when it comes to dating. It is just significantly harder for us when some women, especially some asian women, have a "no dating asians policy." You would never hear someone get flat out rejected with a "sorry, i don't date whites." Studies have found that black women and asian men are considered as the least desirable in dating, which in my opinion, is highly related to how Hollywood has negatively portrayed asian men as asexual nerds and black women as always loud and angry. Nia might be able to give some insights on this topic. Yes, the system is rigged, but there is always a positive way to look at it. When I get rejected, I see it as a win to my wallet and my time. I am not interested in having a relationship with a shallow person who would judge me by the color of my skin rather than the content of my character. I don't see it as me being rejected, but them missing out. Being confident is not just about acting confident, but also the attitude. If you walk home alone, why give a shit. Just rub one out yourself. Lastly, here are my three concrete advice: 1. Always wear a condom no matter what she says. 2. Military relationship/marriage often fails. Don't do it. 3. Asians have the genetic advantage of non-aging. When white men like Billy start to go bald in their 30s, we will still look like we are in our 20s. Keep being fit and things will only get easier over time."

Ай мурун
ZONGSHENG LI
ZONGSHENG LI

Hei Bill, thanks for your jokes, really enjoyed listening to your bit. But can you put the "automatically generated English subtitles" function on? I'm not a native speaker, I may not understand every word you said without subtitles.

Ай мурун
1o29s23
1o29s23

Asian guys should be able to get lots of college chicks in this anime loving generation

2 ай мурун
Giovanni Berdejo-Gallegos
Giovanni Berdejo-Gallegos

Bill, you’re the best. Thanks for reading my email and the shout of my book, One Angry Veteran. Hope to get your feedback. Take care and happy new year

2 ай мурун
Ryno Horn
Ryno Horn

Why you trying to French everything up Bill?

2 ай мурун
callum young
callum young

2:55 got me dying haha 😂😂😂

2 ай мурун
Omgdannie2
Omgdannie2

18-1, baby! Yaa lost. Greedy cheating Pats.

2 ай мурун
Naughty Monkey
Naughty Monkey

"Super hero, reluctant, alopecia" LMAO.. what the fuck?! That's the most retarded search attempt ever! And why I love Billl Burr so much haha

2 ай мурун
Raymond Díaz
Raymond Díaz

Did anyone else angrily scream "One Punch Man" at the video?

2 ай мурун
Allan Adamson
Allan Adamson

because I don't want to be the guy that's actually paying his next ferrari payment

2 ай мурун
Allan Adamson
Allan Adamson

yeah I should put up and market an anti-homeless fund I mean but then I'd be busy figuring out which homeless people are the real homeless people before I give them money lol

2 ай мурун
Allan Adamson
Allan Adamson

I think I'm getting back into Madden next season yeah was the plan we'll see if I pick up another PS5 probably or if the PC version next year is decent.. they have expressed a desire to get back on the PC platform because Madden had been console only for nearly a decade and then people were patching an old version of madden to play modern madden on pc so I think that's why EA decided to try it and they have a market so I'm sure they'll continue so I guess I could return on PC even right now but no I don't like to come in mid-season or end of the season online you get nothing for all your effort

2 ай мурун
Ale O
Ale O

44:45

2 ай мурун
RoboTurkeyNinja
RoboTurkeyNinja

Billy Beratin' Boozehound - When are you gonna check out NXIAM? Or it is NXIUM? It's a secret sec cult right in Los Angeles that included several actor ladieeees from that Smallville show. I only just discovered it recently

2 ай мурун
Robert Levy
Robert Levy

You are world-class at what you do, except for the reading part.

2 ай мурун
SD3Dot
SD3Dot

Hey Bill Burr- where's your Mandolorian spin-off? I mean they announced all the others! I really enjoyed the episodes you were in! A spin-off about Mayfeld could explore his past through flashbacks, (maybe with some hair lol) his time in the Empire and where he's going now that he's a free man. What planet is Migs Mayfeld from? I bet it's wicked pisser wherever it is! heh

2 ай мурун
As a Kite
As a Kite

Hahaha what's with the questions on this one? I hope they're all trolls otherwise these people are seriously sick

2 ай мурун
Alex Smith
Alex Smith

Kangaroos instead of reindeer for global warming

2 ай мурун
Tony Zio
Tony Zio

That army ad soundtrack is similar. Fellow percussionist, I was wondering if you took lessons.

2 ай мурун
Trent Osborne
Trent Osborne

The techno part 🤣🤣🤣

2 ай мурун
RoboTurkeyNinja
RoboTurkeyNinja

1:05:16 ffs Billy Bawbag🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿 it's "nuclear" not "nuke-ya-lurr" 🤣🤣🤣

2 ай мурун
Allan Adamson
Allan Adamson

okay I gotta name one more name.. DANGERFIELD ... I HAVE NOTHING BUT RESPECT FOR DANGERFIELD... Rodney rest in peace

2 ай мурун
Allan Adamson
Allan Adamson

most of the GOATs are all but retired .. Seinfeld.. Murphy.... or dead... Carlin... Pryor... no need to spam the names

2 ай мурун
Allan Adamson
Allan Adamson

yeah you gotta hang around awhile Bill.. the comedian depth chart isn't actually that deep these days hahaha not with top prospects anyway

2 ай мурун
Flight Cr3W
Flight Cr3W

Jesus christ. What a MOS to have. That vets story was heart felt. Crazy I didn't see many comments about his read.

2 ай мурун
MrEther Robert Warner
MrEther Robert Warner

I S S = International Space Station

2 ай мурун
Allan Adamson
Allan Adamson

& I'm JUST checking in.. to say.. Merry Christmas.. oh and I saw you Mandalorian episode.. well your latest one.. it was great.. they should have had your character there to tell them all who the fuck Luke Skywalker was haha.. that would have been great.. you're all.. he blew up the death star, how could you not know who he is !? lol

2 ай мурун
قاصدک طلایی
قاصدک طلایی

I am Persian but not a muslim. we celebrate Yalda in Dec. the night before the first day of winter.💜

2 ай мурун
Al
Al

"It's totally exaggerated, they make out like you walk into the club,and there are people with signs (not to mention [trump isn't so bad])? I like you, but you are a hilarious moron!

2 ай мурун
lovely jubbly
lovely jubbly

May I request that you stop using the Lord's name in vain?

2 ай мурун
Detroit Dave
Detroit Dave

The hitler’s mustache thing was real tho ¿

2 ай мурун
lovely jubbly
lovely jubbly

Jesus loves you

2 ай мурун
Ravyn Katzen
Ravyn Katzen

"The donkey's whole face is a mustache."

2 ай мурун
John Ross
John Ross

Love this guy, wish he was my dad....the ginger bald fuck.

2 ай мурун
Miss So
Miss So

Happy holidays, young man. 🎁🎄⛄❄

2 ай мурун
Mnyama Kamili
Mnyama Kamili

I'm clinically diagnosed with "I'm not obj hey dick head you saved me

2 ай мурун
Mnyama Kamili
Mnyama Kamili

Mr burr thank you everyday I wanna suck barrel of a 45

2 ай мурун
Tyler
Tyler

Every time I don’t see him all I picture is Frank from F is for Family lol

2 ай мурун
Good Day
Good Day

I got people sendin' me razors, sendin' me meat...I'm movin'.

2 ай мурун
Mort Lavie
Mort Lavie

Yo Bill you stole that episode of Mando! Awesome in that table scene with Hess!

2 ай мурун
b_ammar
b_ammar

happy moharram!!!! ....damn he is so wrong there

2 ай мурун
Alex Duran
Alex Duran

Your mess hall scene in Mandalorian was outstanding. Watched it repeatedly, some of the best acting this year.

2 ай мурун
Dale Fry
Dale Fry

"You can't totally smash the thing cause then you gotta lick it off the wall" made me laugh so fuckin hard 🤣🤣🤣

2 ай мурун
MB
MB

37:14 HAHAHAHAAHAHAH could be the funniest song ive ever heard

2 ай мурун
Jose Matias
Jose Matias

Dam i am watching Mandalorian "The Believer" and i must say even there is character sounds like the Bill Burr wise man. Beauty, i love him as a comedian and i am loving it as an actor, great! Hope he keeps doing more stuff, i am impressed again by his work.

2 ай мурун
Von
Von

Good morning football, honestly hates rams

2 ай мурун
Viflo
Viflo

Hhhhiiiimmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmzzz

2 ай мурун
Meg Griffin
Meg Griffin

Why is Trevor Noah this you realize that he doesn't write anything he says on the show

2 ай мурун
Ghostfenrir
Ghostfenrir

Trevor Noah is also a stand up comic. Before covid, I think he spent most of his weekends traveling and performing. He has a few specials as well.

Ай мурун
Superior Being
Superior Being

Top French = Irreversible

2 ай мурун
F
F

keep ripping the Fins as they piss on your head lol

2 ай мурун
Ram
Ram

3:49 brooooo wtf😭😭😭 Bill just went from "reptiles" to "speaking of jews" in under 5 seconds😵😵

2 ай мурун
Peter Lewis
Peter Lewis

Disney will not pay for that !!!!

2 ай мурун
Gabriel
Gabriel

Monday aaahaahaa lol

2 ай мурун
Ehtisham Hussain
Ehtisham Hussain

Dude. The 10th of Muharram is a day of mourning.

2 ай мурун
Some One
Some One

Hey Bill. Just Bill. Heard a past podcast where you said you dont mind a compliment... I fuckin love your comedy and honestY. Awesome guy. Self deprecating. Awesome!! Me too. Life sucks but ya gotta laugh. LOLOL

2 ай мурун
Shonicica Blackmon
Shonicica Blackmon

Hi Bill I saw you on Mandalorian today inmate 34666 you have 3 seconds to comply

2 ай мурун
Colton Almos
Colton Almos

Please God somebody make a remix 37:15

2 ай мурун
Ego-Less Omnipresence
Ego-Less Omnipresence

Bill needs to do less selling out, I mean acting. You're a comedian first.

2 ай мурун
Ego-Less Omnipresence
Ego-Less Omnipresence

@Tracy Stephens Following Burr since 2002. Yes, in his contract with Disney and the studios he has to perpetuate Covid-19 regulations. All of the entertainment media responsibility is to perpetuate a narrative that propagandizes to the mass population. Being a comedian preserves Bill's integrity, being a actor jeopardizes it.

2 ай мурун
Tracy Stephens
Tracy Stephens

You call it selling out.. I call it giving us all a gift of another side of the Ol'Billy Balls. He crushes the acting gigs & loves doing it so in turn I do too. Selling out? Gtfo with that Metallica cut their hair horseshit.

2 ай мурун
Peel Tank
Peel Tank

Love to watch you in mandalorian. I hope you come back in season three.

2 ай мурун
Hydamayr
Hydamayr

Bill please learn how to use a search engine.

2 ай мурун
TheMagnuspi
TheMagnuspi

Thousands of people screaming “One Punch Man!”

2 ай мурун
Lasl
Lasl

All he had to do was read one more sentence 😂😂

2 ай мурун
Sally Martin
Sally Martin

Hahahahahahaha

2 ай мурун
Tyler Williams
Tyler Williams

i love that he watches One Punch Man.XDDD

2 ай мурун
Raad Yahya
Raad Yahya

Your laugh is funny in itself🤣, like the way you laugh dude

2 ай мурун
Not here to make friends With u
Not here to make friends With u

Do u think Bill knows people are making up the stupid things people say emails? I think he does because he usually breezes right passed the obviously bullshit questions.

2 ай мурун
Wolf Kakashi
Wolf Kakashi

Bill getting mad because he can't remember the name One Punch Man made my day 😂

2 ай мурун
Kevin
Kevin

Oh man. Eddie Izzard and that whole bit with the flags and WWII. "No flag, No Country !" 🤣

2 ай мурун
Leslie Farquharson
Leslie Farquharson

Good lord, Bill. Its the International Space Station (ISS). lol.

2 ай мурун
Edward
Edward

51:43 lol that caught me off guard so hard

2 ай мурун
͝Λ̷͝ d ̷Z̷૯ ̟t̟ ƛ
͝Λ̷͝ d ̷Z̷૯ ̟t̟ ƛ

Diabolique....

2 ай мурун
JWithy222
JWithy222

holy shit can you do a burr christmas album lmaooo

2 ай мурун
Anthony Hall
Anthony Hall

Holy fuck you have a podcast. Where the fuck have I been.

2 ай мурун
The Cabin John Channel
The Cabin John Channel

"I'm such an idiot! It's...I'm such an idiot! I just... I'm such a fuckin' idiot!" LMAO

2 ай мурун
capealio
capealio

So whose he doing this co headline thing with

2 ай мурун
Wolgang Winters
Wolgang Winters

I love when Bill rags on Ohio State fans. I'm a Buckeye fan and I root for my team so Bill can unleash his red freckled fury. ❤️😀

2 ай мурун
Generally Awesome
Generally Awesome

Reindeer will be replaced by Amazon drones

2 ай мурун
Anti Christ
Anti Christ

Best Comedian Ever!

2 ай мурун
Liladelph
Liladelph

13:43 That's a nice SPREAD! ...he kept saying that. *"It HaS a NiCe SpReAd!"* Way to throw in the golden nuggets for ya boys.

2 ай мурун
Harry Fyhr
Harry Fyhr

Bill - And speaking of jewish people.. well,this is gonna be awesome

2 ай мурун
Angelica Peterson
Angelica Peterson

He said I almost wrote Muslim Christmas he would’ve been put on a hit list 🤣🤣🤣🤣 and his laugh tied it all together ... hilarious .. 1:13 seconds in 🤣🤣🤣

2 ай мурун
Jay Hooks
Jay Hooks

Such an evil laugh he has lol 😂

2 ай мурун
dawsons creek
dawsons creek

20 minutes on American sports that the rest of the world don't give a fuck about. I love Bill but Jesus christ most of your fans aren't American

2 ай мурун
Mark M.J. Lewandowski Jr
Mark M.J. Lewandowski Jr

Thanks for the Shout out to my Buffalo Bills.

2 ай мурун
brownman304
brownman304

And this guy is on the mandalorian

2 ай мурун
Arnold Gutierrez
Arnold Gutierrez

Each box comes with 9 to 12 lbs of meat...ladies...*laughs*....I was cracking up like a 10 year old

2 ай мурун
Surf to Plate
Surf to Plate

Bill your part in the Mandalorian was very enjoyable.

2 ай мурун
James Kirk
James Kirk

Bill Burr killed today, when space turds from ISS collided with his head. Bills last words, what the hell is ISS.

2 ай мурун
Phil Rockwell
Phil Rockwell

The One Punch Man part is fukn hilarious. 53:25 😂😂😂🙆😭

2 ай мурун
Chris Caravello
Chris Caravello

Great call about the Dolphins! And then on the other hand you have Jim Kelly guaranteeing that's Josh Allen will be breaking all his records in Buffalo and he is all for it. You gotta love that shit.

2 ай мурун
James Kirk
James Kirk

Lock it off the wall

2 ай мурун
Lijo Lalu Korah
Lijo Lalu Korah

Bill, you should cut these long videos into clips and give interesting titles. other channels do this and steal your views basically. love ya Bill

2 ай мурун
Felipe Augusto Fortes de Lena
Felipe Augusto Fortes de Lena

Does he only talk about sports now? What’s going on?

2 ай мурун
Sirvalorsax
Sirvalorsax

Bill Burr is my favorite white comedian. His style of comedy is so perfect for Star Wars Mandolorian I feel like its one of the best decisions they've made post Disney sequels.

2 ай мурун
Corey Mendoza
Corey Mendoza

That anime section fucking cracked me up

2 ай мурун
Vivi *
Vivi *

Did you actually hear Tom Cruise's rant? Yes he has a right to be angry, but he just went on a narcissistic tirade on how powerful he was, how many people depend on him, how if he wants he can shut the whole thing down... it was cringe.

2 ай мурун
Titan Gamez
Titan Gamez

I mean the dude gets treated like a King by Scientology, he has his own servants who can’t even look him in the eye.

2 ай мурун
exactinmidget92
exactinmidget92

well it was nice having that Butcher Box sponsor.

2 ай мурун
Vitamin G
Vitamin G

Listening in from UK .... 3rd lockdown for me so this podcast has certainly made the morning easier. Cheers

2 ай мурун
Jon Davis
Jon Davis

My man in yemen called pounds an imaginary unit. Ouch.

2 ай мурун

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